Confessions of a Serial Interviewer by Steven Ra Ga

No body likes rejection. It hurts. But one thing to remember is not take it personally. It helps to brush it off and keep going.

Since the creation of job posting websites it’s become increasingly convenient for employers to pass on your application.

The typical indeed response goes like “Unfortunately we found the right candidate for this position”

I often wonder why they say that? Like it’s unfortunate they chose the right person for the position? Like how does that person feel? “Hey man you were unfortunately selected for this role.”

Or you get that personal email from HR explaining away why you weren’t picked which often feels like they are trying to not feel guilty.

Or sometimes you never hear back, the follow up to find out the chose someone else.

I personally can take rejection easily except when talking to women that shit never gets easy. I remember when I was single I would be terrified of asking a girl for their number in a cold call situation IRL. Online it was easy I developed a whole recipe for success. The perfect sales pitch.

What is rejection really though, I think it’s just another person telling you no, which dates back to when you were a kid and a parent would tell you no, that trauma, which may have been from a loving place, stuck with you as you aged. So when someone would reject your resume, idea or love advancement you could possibly project the feelings of your parents on to these people which is why it hurts so much when you get rejected.

For me, a letter of rejection from a job is meaningless, it holds no weight or volume to how I see myself, like junk mail that just needs to recycled or burnt.

Today I got rejected and felt like maybe I would share the response.

So a while back I decided to apply to some stores to sell my hobby art. I make creative jackets and furniture by up cycling them, that stated I have found the sales cycles to be long and difficult, utilizing other stores to sell my product in a department store model has been lightly successful… here is a response from one of the stores…

First of all, we apologize it took us so long to get back to you and thank you for your patience. We also want to thank you so much for your interest in selling your creations with [Blank], as well as the time it took to submit your application. We know your brand means the world to you and appreciate you sharing it with us, we are always blown away by the talent in our community!

We received hundreds of applicants in the last few months with interest to sell in one of our 4 shops and although we wish we could work with everyone, we just don’t have the space. With that said, a lot of our categories are currently full and your products fall among them so we unfortunately at this time are not able to accept your brand into our shops. This is not at all a reflection of your brand and we want to encourage you to continue your love for your creative journey. After all that’s what this is all about, (we think). Keep creating, keep growing and most of all love what you’re doing.

We thank you again, we wish you all the best and keep up the amazing work! We do encourage you to apply again in a few months as things are always changing. In the meantime we are now offering workshops and pop up space, you can find more details here

I it always feels like they are trying to cross all their T’s and dot their i’s when this kind of long winded response comes through. As though I am not busy enough, Now I have to read a novel why you said no rather than just simply saying no. And I know it’s because most people have difficulty saying the word no, so rather than saying just No there is always that long winding reason why it’s a no, so you don’t ask more questions…

Some times I feel like asking why just to get a response from the person who said no, to see if I can goat then into a hard no. Usually doesn’t work, sometimes I can befriend them in the process so it because like a forced awkward friendship, where you make plans to meet them for coffee then ghost them with a long winded response why meeting them isn’t high on your list of priorities between getting gas for your car and getting your hair cut.

Looks like I got another one…

Hello,

Unfortunately, [Blank Company] has decided not to move forward with your application at this time.

While we wish we had better news, continuing to search and apply for jobs will help you maintain your momentum. Best of Luck!

Okay, time to send out a few resumes…